From Russia With Love

Apparently oxygen is really good for you.

I mean, I already knew that, obviously, because we breathe it and everything. But I get an extra serving of oxygen. Everyday we take the kids up to the second floor to the doctor's office and they line up and get plastic cups of white foam. The first time this happened, I asked the assistant what it was and she said, "oxygen" and my first thought was "well no not really because oxygen isn't foamy." They gave one to me so of course I ate it and it kind of tastes fruity--like apple juice but just foamy. And you eat it with a spoon.
The kids that speak English called it a "cocktail" and since I eat one everyday, I thought it might be good to know what it is. And I'll be honest, at first I thought, "Russians are crazy. This is so weird." But then I figured that if they gave it to children it couldn't be bad for me so of course I kept eating them. Well. I found out that apparently the Soviet Union was the first to have these oxygen cocktails in the 1960s-70s and it was especially for athletes, and Olympic athletes used it and it was a secret that they wouldn't share with anyone! Well I guess they decided to share the secret because now we all know. They're supposed to be really good for your skin and metabolism and other stuff and apparently oxygen bars are getting more popular. Except that the only places I found this information were websites that weren't necessarily credible...but still. If athletes use it and it's a Soviet secret, you know it's legit. Those Soviet scientists...after they finished figuring out Sputnik they needed a new project and decided to eat oxygen. That's two things they do better than America.